TO SELF...
That one moment of absolute loneliness when all the significant integrals as well as the fillers are offline and the regularities of life leave u with afew major minutes in hand. U can hear the needles sweeping off the seconds, the blades of fan gyrating the surrounding constituents of air, the shrilling sound of the nocturnals at intervals, the deep breath of the little one succumbed beside u... and suddenly you feel the emptiness !
Every being, be it minute or mammoth, has a function assigned at this dead moment of night... and you ! you are so jobless !
Statically lying legs, the hands folded under the head, eyes wandering to detect the un-perceived in the dim available light & above all the stray thoughts wandering aimlessly here & there ! "Give me some life ! " You murmur to yourrself & chop off the 90 degrees in the arena ! And the eyes begin to search in a new dimension.
Strict sleeplessness ! Probably the racing thoughts in my mind aren't allowing the powerhouse to slumber down. The craving of sharing is on steroids I guess, its heightening at an inescapable speed, beyond every trial of caging. But I tried... to fail... allowed myself another roll about n "not asleep yet" banged my ears. "Going for water" I whispered & left the pitch with the sigh of a lost player to leave the rest undisturbed, lost in the blessed world. With the utmost effort of a soundless attempt I tried digging in for my earphones & probably this was my first reward of the night , they were knitted in my fingers ! Another voice less attempt & I unlatched the door to unleash the trodden.
The aura in my veranda was little scary but the temptation overpowering me probably had enough to subdue the altercations. Cautiously my fingers crawled to detect the switch. My encounter with any unwanted existence could discourage me so I was extra alert ! Carefully I slouched in the bean bag & with another little effort put off the intriguing unwanted unnatural source of light. It was no more dark neither scary outside.
The milky bundle probably had a bountiful day today. It had imbibed plenty to radiate. Illuminate to the extent that the presumed scary night was no more repulsive. From behind the hustling leaves of the giant tree I cud see it dangling, conspiring an uninterrupted and undisputed serenity ! & I was able to listen to feel to see all that was going on around n beyond the around !
The lantern in the sky was a the passionate existence of the belief that nothing cud curtail the felt. I stuffed the earplugs n scrolled the list of assorted numbers on my music player. Music has always been one of my best companion. It either makes you forget all or can remind you of everything, they say.In my case it was working out for both. All the mess & the collation was sinking deep into some blind catastrophe n I was being reminded pleasantly of all that I love! Music has always vibrated all the latent interests. Every beat & each note played, seduced the sense to lose the grip in the self & dive weightlessly into the tranquil world of pleasuresome imagination.
I was happily living the loneliness... the moment !
That one moment of absolute loneliness when all the significant integrals as well as the fillers are offline and the regularities of life leave u with afew major minutes in hand. U can hear the needles sweeping off the seconds, the blades of fan gyrating the surrounding constituents of air, the shrilling sound of the nocturnals at intervals, the deep breath of the little one succumbed beside u... and suddenly you feel the emptiness !
Every being, be it minute or mammoth, has a function assigned at this dead moment of night... and you ! you are so jobless !
Statically lying legs, the hands folded under the head, eyes wandering to detect the un-perceived in the dim available light & above all the stray thoughts wandering aimlessly here & there ! "Give me some life ! " You murmur to yourrself & chop off the 90 degrees in the arena ! And the eyes begin to search in a new dimension.
Strict sleeplessness ! Probably the racing thoughts in my mind aren't allowing the powerhouse to slumber down. The craving of sharing is on steroids I guess, its heightening at an inescapable speed, beyond every trial of caging. But I tried... to fail... allowed myself another roll about n "not asleep yet" banged my ears. "Going for water" I whispered & left the pitch with the sigh of a lost player to leave the rest undisturbed, lost in the blessed world. With the utmost effort of a soundless attempt I tried digging in for my earphones & probably this was my first reward of the night , they were knitted in my fingers ! Another voice less attempt & I unlatched the door to unleash the trodden.
The aura in my veranda was little scary but the temptation overpowering me probably had enough to subdue the altercations. Cautiously my fingers crawled to detect the switch. My encounter with any unwanted existence could discourage me so I was extra alert ! Carefully I slouched in the bean bag & with another little effort put off the intriguing unwanted unnatural source of light. It was no more dark neither scary outside.
The milky bundle probably had a bountiful day today. It had imbibed plenty to radiate. Illuminate to the extent that the presumed scary night was no more repulsive. From behind the hustling leaves of the giant tree I cud see it dangling, conspiring an uninterrupted and undisputed serenity ! & I was able to listen to feel to see all that was going on around n beyond the around !
The lantern in the sky was a the passionate existence of the belief that nothing cud curtail the felt. I stuffed the earplugs n scrolled the list of assorted numbers on my music player. Music has always been one of my best companion. It either makes you forget all or can remind you of everything, they say.In my case it was working out for both. All the mess & the collation was sinking deep into some blind catastrophe n I was being reminded pleasantly of all that I love! Music has always vibrated all the latent interests. Every beat & each note played, seduced the sense to lose the grip in the self & dive weightlessly into the tranquil world of pleasuresome imagination.
I was happily living the loneliness... the moment !
